Wedding cin-cin

Another single friend bit the bullet and got hitched last night; sealing their love officially with a big-arse hotel banquet and a rather touching speech. The groom got sloshed and began talking loudly - after the punishing 'yum seng'. I was amused whenever he saw me and asked why I chose my italian class over his solemnisation lunch! Haha. Mi dispiace caro.

I told my sister to remind me not to have a typical hotel wedding if I ever get lucky. I want to be shoeless with grass or sand underneath my feet, the sun shining down on our happy shiny faces, flowers in my hair and friends all toasty and high on an endless supply of italian prosecco. That'd be perfetto.

Divino vino

Last Friday while out sniffing out un italiano ristorante nuovo at the Dempsey enclave, I left unimpressed with the service and prices but hung onto the cock of our S$62 bottiglia di vino 'Possessioni Rosso' - an utterly delizioso velvety gem from the villa Serego Alighieri and Masi cooperation. Che romantica when I realised that these talented winemakers are also direct descendents of the poet Dante Alighieri (best known for his 'Divine Comedy').

Hmm, perhaps I might just drop in and drink my liver dry at Casal dei Ronchi slapped in between Verona and Veneto, since nearby medieval town Mantova is on my itinerary this autumn. Anyway I want to say salute to my latest amico E da Roma - ciao bello! Spero ti sei divertito leggere il mio blog. Allora, forse ci vediamo quando torno in Italia. Non posso credere che ho finito livello dell'intermedio 2 ora... and moving onto intermedio 3! I'm still shitty at carrying on conversations under pressure but hopefully I can string together a few sentences and replies back in my 'comfort zone'.

Whenever I'm hungry for Motherland, I'd whip up a HUGE bowl of pasta per esempio, last week I cooked penne al porcini e parmigiano in 2 consecutive evenings, to which my mamma turned her nose up at the heavenly pungency of the cheese. V had brought me a precious small block of parmigiano from Bologna 'La Grassa' that I grated lovingly and sparingly over each pasta meal. Here's the formula for bliss - go on try it, it's easy.


'Motherland' Penne Al Porcini e Parmigiano
Ingredients
3 fistfuls of penne, cooked al dente
2 cloves garlic, finely chopped
2 tbsp extra virgin olive oil
10 slivers of dried porcini, soaked in hot water & drained
4 sprigs of basil, roughly chopped/ torn
1 generous tbsp freshly grated parmigiano
Pinch of piccante / chilli flakes
Generous pinch of salt

Method:
- Heat olive oil in pan and fry garlic till fragrant (not burnt!).
- Add porcini and piccante, stir around for 30s and add cooked penne.
- Mix well for 30s, then add basil and salt.
- Remove from heat and serve with grated parmigiano. Buonissimo.

Essere o non

To be or not to be... I remembered being single for the longest time during my 20s and so wanted a relationship that I jumped in wholeheartedly when I met someone I fancied a lot for the first time in my life at 27. We were inseparable and I forgot what it was like to be single, independent, to have a life of my own - to do and say what I want. After 2 years which culminated into a destructive, abusive ending, I found myself thrown back into singletonhood. Which I was equally grateful and resentful of.

It was like a dirty word - single. Singled out. I was suddenly afraid of being alone. Plus coping with the aftermath of a emotional meltdown didn't do much for my morale and self-esteem. Paranoia and anxiety attacks almost ate me up, as I found myself a nervous wreck sobbing uncontrollably on the train home. Counselling didn't help and I knew I had to confront and conquer my own demons my way.

So I packed my bags for a 12-week solo journey to do battle with every single shitty fear imaginable - flying alone, sleeping alone, eating alone, travelling alone, getting lost alone but also ultimately finding myself on my own terms. It was a calling that left me more empowered and wiser than ever.

This year as I celebrated almost 3 years of singlehood (oh god, a born-again virgin!), I couldn't be happier to be where I am now. Si, I am still glaringly single among my many married friends but I'm glad that I'm no desperado. Yet. I see lots of people get sucked into compromising relationships because they are afraid to be on their own, and love and respect themselves first. They turn to others for the wrong kind of assurance and approval, and end up being unkind to themselves; caught in a vicious circle.

Sure, everyone wants to love and be loved but secondo me, I think we all need to be kinder to ourselves first before taking the leap, si o non? Looking back, I realised I dated a few losers who including 'Run Randy' who asked me to lose weight when I wasn't fat (I dropped him like a hat days later). And Jason who hinted to me that his ex girlfriend lost a lot of weight on a diet of cigarettes and coffee alone (asking me to give up food, siao!). There was also 'Z' whom I ran into recently, still as charming but as lost. I never regretted breaking up with him.

And to think the last hellish relationship would turn me into a nun for good, I took the liberty to organise a 'Traffic Stopper' festa last month to kickstart my foray back into the dating scene. Va bene, it didn't went as well as we'd like (15 single women to 3 single+ 2 married+ 1 gay men) but we're pressing ahead with another sizzling 'Viva Cuba!' fiesta this week (never give up, mai!). At my last count, RSVP came up to almost 40 - ooh hoo. I will def say it again - may the best man win! :)